The Gift of Siblings

There was a moment this morning before school drop off when I was changing Selah’s diaper. Jude was having a hard morning and just a sad baby all around. He was crying “mama hold youuu” over + over again. It was one of those moments that come all too often, where two need me but I’m very aware that there’s only one of me to give.

This time I looked at Elle and said “Sis can you hold your brother, he’s sad.” She said “I can’t hold him mom. He’s too big”. I told her “Just put your arms around him and hold him.”

So she did. And the sweetest thing happened. Jude fully embraced her and they stood there together in the middle of our living room. Jude’s crying slowed down. For the next ten minutes she was so kind to him. Holding him, taking his hand, giving him toys, speaking to him with her “teacher voice”. As I sat and watched this scene unfold, I about cried.

There are some days when my weakness is all too obvious. I’m only one. And they are three. I know I can’t give each kid all the things, all the time. Some days this is devastating to me. In harder moments I wonder if I had too many, too close together.

But not today.

Today God showed me that while there’s only one of me, the three of them have each other. That’s a gift. I won’t be enough. I wouldn’t be, even if I only had one to love. I’d still lack. But God. He is big and good and always enough. Always. And some days these kids downright surprise the heck out of me with their kind + compassionate hearts.

This home, inside these walls, on a regular Wednesday morning, really is where they learn about life + love + kindness.

In the car on the way to school I told Eleanor that I was really proud of her for making Jude feel better this morning. She said “Yeah mama I did it! I hold him and that make ME soooo happy!!”

This girl. She’s on to something. Making others feel better, less sad, or just giving them room to cry with you—that is what brings us the joy.