Happy Anniversary, my love 💛

I smile thinking about you as a 19-year-old boy. You wore those graphic tees like it was no ones business. You were right out of high school, your newfound faith still so fresh. I remember finally agreeing to sit with you in the back row of Pysch 101, even though it pained me to give up my spot in the front. Studying for the world’s easiest quizzes together in your dorm room, just as an excuse to spend time with you.  And my rebel streak—climbing in and out of your dorm room window to avoid being caught after hours.

Then we got married. I’ll never forget the beginning days of marriage. Living in LA, kid-free + so much disposable income.  Our date nights at the Lab drinking beer or sitting at the bar top at Wade’s Wine. Driving to Santa Monica for burgers at Father’s Office or celebrating in the backroom of Tar + Roses. How we could do day trips to Santa Barbara on a whim, or weekends in San Diego. How it was so easy to jet off for the long weekend to New Orleans or Chicago.

Our life now looks so different than those early years of dating and marriage. Now our weekends are filled with yard work + playing in the backyard. Coordinating our days around nap time. Being home by 6pm every night to put the kid’s down. Eating at home before we go out on dates, or date nights in the backyard. It’s a whole lot of saying “Eleanor go tell Daddy you have a surprise for him” when I don’t want to change another dirty diaper. Or “Do you want to go get him…?” when Jude wakes up crying in the middle of the night and we’re both in REM. It’s dividing and conquering together after dinner to tackle bath and bedtime. It’s car rides where usually one kid is crying or fussy and we’re pulling out every trick in the bag to calm them, eventually just letting them watch Finding Dory on the iPad. Our motto—‘hey whatever it takes”.

So much has changed—and yet it hasn’t.

Instead of taking me to those underground Macklemore concerts, we play his music videos in our living room and dance, with a kid in each arm laughing as we jump around like idiots. Instead of discovering new breweries and coffee houses, we brew our own beer and cold brew.  No more Mumford and Sons outdoor concerts under the stars at the Hollywood Bowl, but we still play their songs on Pandora for Jude because he loves them for some reason. Rather than going to Tar + Roses for the $36 cheese + meat board, we make our own picnic and eat it on a blanket in the living room. Instead of cruising down PCH in your BMW with the top down, we drive on the 99 with the windows down in the Spark….

Okay some things ARE just different. 

But as simple as it may seem, I love our life together. I love that we made these little humans, and we are shaping and influencing them together each day. I love budgeting with you + feeling like we’re tackling our financial goals as a team. I love how we light candles to initiate and talk openly about sex. How after years of feeling so afraid and insecure—I feel safe with you. I never doubt your love for me, or your commitment to our marriage and our family.

We have grown up together. Seen so many different sides of each other. The college kids with no responsibilities—the long distance version of each other—the Resident Advisors—the confused post-grad—the young married—the new parents. I have loved falling in love with a different you each year. We’re the same, but we’re different too. I’m excited for year four together. Let’s make some more memories (+ some more babies).

Happy Anniversary, my love.